


Day at the Office

by WhisperOfWarmth



Category: Reylo - Fandom, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, The Office (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Star Wars Fusion, Alternate Universe - The Office Fusion, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Awkward Crush, Best Friends, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Funny, Humor, I Ship It, Kylo Ren Needs a Hug, Mutual Pining, Random & Short, Rey Kenobi, Rey Needs A Hug, Reylo - Freeform, Secret Crush, Snoke Being a Dick, Star Wars References, The Last Jedi - Freeform, Unresolved Romantic Tension, friend-zoned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 05:13:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14128863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhisperOfWarmth/pseuds/WhisperOfWarmth
Summary: This is intended to be written like an episode of The Office (the American version). The characters don't necessarily match up with who I'm writing them as, but here they are, as follows:-Supreme Leader Snoke = Michael Scott-Kylo Ren = Jim Halpert-Hux = Dwight Shrute-Phasma = Angela-Rey = Pam Beasley-Poe Dameron = Roy-Luke Skywalker = Toby-Rose = the one lady who works in the warehouseAnd, obviously, The First Order becomes Dunder Mifflin.Quick Note: the abbreviation "LOC" will mean "looks on camera", as in whichever character that's in front of, that means the character is doing a side camera interview, like on the show.





	Day at the Office

LOC  
Snoke: "Galactic domination isn't an easy business. You have to work at it, every day. An empire is like a family, and I, being Supreme Leader, am at the head of this family. And I'm fortunate that I have some of the best children around."

((Cut away to Hux, on an intergalactic holo-call with the leader of another planet))

Hux, leaning forward in his chair, looking intensely into projected image: "You know you can't hold out on us forever. Giving yourself up now would ensure a nice, easy transition into a new life, one free of worry, of disorder. Continuing to resist is only hurting you, and the planet you claim to love so much. Right now, we have a laser aimed directly at your planets core. Within seconds, everything you love, every person you've ever spoken to, women and children included, can be turned into smouldering ash. Spare us the trouble, and --"

Hux is cut off when Kylo Ren reaches across his desk and hits End on Hux's call.

"Kylo! What the hell, man! I was just making progress with them, you karking asshole!"

"No, you weren't. You were threatening, again. That's not a good way to --"

"Excuse me, but when YOUR planetary conversion numbers are as high as mine, THEN you can talk to me about my methods."

Hux prepares to dial another planet, and Kylo sighs, realizing the futility of arguing with him. He stands up and stretches, and casually saunters to the desk of Rey. Rey's entire face lights up when he's near, although she tries (and fails) desperately to hide this. 

"Is it time for lunch yet?", Kylo asked her, stealing a handful of candies from the bowl on top of her desk.

Rey smiled, shaking her head.

"'Fraid not. It's only 10am, in fact."

Kylo rolled his eyes, taking another handful of candy. "10am? Maker, time flies when you're not having fun, doesn't it?"

Now he leans across the desk closer to her, staring at her with his beautiful, intense hazel eyes. He gives her his most charming smile, and says, lightly,

"Speaking of lunch, though; what are you doing for yours? Because I was thinking I'd go and try that new Endorian place up the block. I would surely like the company, if you're interested. On me, of course."

Rey smiled apologetically, and regretfully shook her head. "While that DOES sound fun, I can't. I'm having lunch with Poe today."

Poe was Rey's fiancée. He worked downstairs in the maintenance rooms, alongside Finn, Rose, and a slew of others. 

Kylo looked down, and put on a smile to hide his disappointment. 

"Ah, okay, then. Well, maybe another time?"

"Definitely," Rey said, somewhat sadly, watching him walk back to his seat.

LOC  
Rey: I honestly wish I could just go with Kylo. I mean, the last time I had lunch with Poe, he spent the whole time playing Sabbac with Finn and Rose, then had to borrow credits from ME to cover his losses. But I guess being a good wife is learning to live with your husband's habits and hobbies, both good and bad. Not that we're married yet. Not that we've even set a date, yet. But someday . . ."

Cut away to Hux and Phasma, the first two to arrive in the conference room for the daily meeting. They are sitting 4 chairs apart, yet speaking as quietly as they can, to each other. There is obviously something going on between them, although absolutely NOBODY in the First Order wants to guess what that 'something' could be. But it's apparent, to anyone who looks. Phasma has a scolding mother vibe to her that Hux seems weirdly attracted to, just as Phasma seems to find Hux's intense, often depraved quest for discipline and power to be inexplicably sexy.

"I had a call to Tattoine today," Hux whispered in her direction, a small smile on his face. "Spoke with one of the Hutt overlords about signing up with the First Order. He seemed really receptive."

Phasma kept her eyes facing forward, but her body had shifted just slightly in Hux's direction, clearly interested.

"The Hutt family is powerful. And I heard that if one member agrees to something, the others feel obligated to do so, as well. You could be landing a huge acquisition for the Order."

Hux nodded, humming a bit to himself. " _Maybe_ if I land the Hutts, I can finally get promoted from that sarlacc-pit desk, to a higher division. MAYBE, I could even be in Snoke's seat, one day."

Phasma smiled, and was about to say something more, when Snoke walked into the room.

"You will not, nor will you EVER achieve heights so grand, that you'll be 'in my seat', Hux. At least not while I'm alive. Am I understood, Hux?"

Hux sighed and nodded. "Yes, sir."

"Better luck next time, General," Kylo said, entering the room. His face was glistening with sweat and his overcoat was off, revealing his unfairly big muscles. He had just come inside from training. Other people took breaks to go outside and smoke, but Kylo, with Snoke's permission, went out to slash at things with his lightsaber. He took a seat across from Rey, winking at her before saying, to Hux:

“Good news: the clouds have come back out.”

"How is that good news?"

"It's good for the rest of us, who don't want to see your sunburnt face."

There were titters around the room, and Hux glared fiercely at Kylo. "Your infantile attempts at humor leave much to be desired, you ignoramus."

"Glad to see you're putting the new office thesaurus to use," Kylo shot back, leaning back in his chair. "Just like that word you wouldn't shut up saying last week. What was it? Acquiesce?"

Glowering at him now, Hux said, slowly,

"At least I make efforts to better myself mentally. All you do all day is pretend to work, make repeated trips to Rey, and swing around your laser-sword in the parking lot."

Rey had blushed when Hux mentioned her, looking down at her DataPad.

"Hux! Ren! ENOUGH!", Snoke roared from the front of the room. "The purpose of this meeting is to suggest ways to improve the First Order, NOT berate and belittle each other. Now, does anyone have any _helpful_ suggestions?"

Phasma raised her hand. “I’d like to restate my idea of implementing an employee uniform.”

Groans from around the room.

“Picture how orderly everything would look, if everyone just wore white, with black trim. We’d look more like a cohesive unit, than a bunch of random people mashed together.”

Snoke nodded thoughtfully. “I’ll give it my full consideration. What else?”

 

"I have one," Luke said, raising his hand. "How about an employee compliment box? Like a complaint box, but for compliments. Each day everyone's goal is to write one nice thing about at least one other person in the office, and at the end of the day, that person gets to read what was said about them. Maybe have a contest, where the person with the most compliments at the end of the month win a prize, or something."

Snoke rolled his eyes. "Sure. And next we'll start holding our meetings on the lawn, and holding hands and singing. Hells, let's invite the Resistance over to join us, while we're at it. Does that sound good to you, Luke?"

Luke sighed, got up and left. Snoke had always disliked him, and the years past found him making less of an effort to conceal it.

When he was gone, Snoke said, "Anyone else?"

Hux raised his hand.

"Yes?"

Hux stood. "Get rid of Kylo."

Kylo threw up his hands, and Snoke groaned.

"Really, you over-gelled, pompous fuck?"

"What? He said ways to improve the First Order, didn't he? I can think of nothing that would make this place better, you useless, arrogant, wanna-be Sith Lord."

Kylo jumped up and lit into Hux with a series of blows. Rey and Phasma also jumped up, trying to separate them.

Cut away to Snoke, LOC:

Snoke: "Being a father-figure to these incredible individuals is wonderful, it really is. I can't think of a more satisfying job than this. We try and have good fun, here, in this family. But like in any family, there's always a healthy amount of bickering that goes on. And like any father, you have to know when a firm hand is needed, to discipline when your kids get out of line."

Cut back to the meeting, Hux and Kylo are now dangling mid air, being held up by the Force by Snoke, being force-choked. Both are gasping for air, their hands clawing at their throats, while Rey and Phasma look helplessly on.

After what seemed like forever, Snoke released them, and each lay on the floor, drawing bouts of air into their starved lungs.

"Good meeting," Snoke said to everyone, standing. "Dismissed."

Rey went to Kylo, helping him off the floor.

"You okay, there, buddy?"

Kylo nodded, letting Rey take his hand. He couldn't help but close his eyes and lean in to her, inhaling the sweet light scent of her perfume. She briefly closed her eyes as well; Kylo had a subtle but intoxicating scent to him.

Hux interrupted the moment by walking in-between the two of them, getting into Kylo’s face.

“Snoke isn’t always going to be around to save you, you know. One day, I’m going to get my revenge on you. For everything.”

“I don’t doubt that. You’re the kind of coward that would pull a blaster on an unconscious man. But ‘one day’, isn’t TODAY. So do yourself a favor and get out of my face, before I finish what I started, with the caff.”

Kylo clapped his hand to his mouth after that last sentence, putting on a look of surprise.

“Caff?”, Hux asked, suspiciously. “What about the caff?”

“Nothing, forget I said anything.”

Hux scoffed. “You’re just trying to scare me. I warn you, it won’t work.”

“Yeah, Kylo,” Rey said, retrieving her own caff mug from the table. “Can’t you think of something more creative than THAT?”

LOC Kylo and Rey:  
Rey: “The last trick Kylo pulled on Hux was amazing.”

Kylo: “I hacked into the computer system and set up a program that would write the word “Deceased” after each time Hux typed his name.”

Rey(laughing)”And then he actually paid everybody ten credits to not speak to or look at Hux, all day. He even used the Force, to make him float a few times!”

Kylo: “He went around the entire day, believing he had become a ghost.”

Rey: “Snoke put an end to it, though, when Hux started taking off his clothes to be ‘more in tune with the spirit world’. And then he found out Kylo had done it, and shocked him with force-lightning for almost an entire hour.”

Kylo: “Worth it.”

 

Cut back to conference room:

Rey went to take a sip from her mug, and Kylo smacked it from her hand, sending it flying across the room.

“Oh my God; you didn’t drink any, did you? None got in your mouth?!”

“A little. What’s the big de - -“

She cut herself off and put a hand to her forehead, her eyes going back in her head. “My goodness, I feel so strange all of a sudden. Lightheaded, and strange.”

“Come on,” Kylo said, taking hold of Rey’s arm and guiding her towards the door. “Let’s take a walk to my Ship to get some antidote - - er, I mean, some air. Yeah, air.”

Hux, meanwhile, had run from the room and into the little kitchen. They could hear the sound of Hux dumping both full pots into the sink. It was when they heard others yelling at him for snatching their drinks out of their hands, that they lost it and started laughing, hard.

“Nice hustle, there; coming in with the caff like that, and then the fake sick spell.”

Rey took a little bow. “Thank you, thank you. Improv isn’t really my forte, but when the scene partner is as awesome as YOU, well, you just go with it.”

He leaned over and hugged her. “We make a great team.”

“Yes, we do.”

Kylo must have held on to her just a bit longer than necessary, because Rey pointedly cleared her throat. When Kylo quickly released her, they were both blushing.

“I - - uh, that is, I have a lot of work to finish up, so - -“

Rey nodded. “And I should probably go make new caff. So - - see you later?”

Kylo nodded, backing out of the room. “See you.”

. . . . .

“That looks like fun.”

Kylo turned around, surprised. It was lunchtime, and he was standing in the wide grassy area between the building and the ship dock, practicing his lightsaber form again. He had been so engrossed that he hadn’t heard Rey walk up behind him. He quickly switched it off and faced her.

“What are you doing here? I thought you were eating with Poe?”

Rey shrugged her shoulders, stepping closer. “They’re having a sabacc tournament; and besides, he hardly noticed I was there, anyway.”

She folded her arms across her chest, tilting her head slightly. “What about YOU? I thought you were going to that new restaurant?”

“Oh, I decided against it.” Now he looked at her hopefully. “Unless - - I mean, if you’re not eating with Poe, we could go check it out. Get some to-go orders, if you want?”

“No, thanks. I don’t have much of an appetite.”

She pointed to his lightsaber, which he was holding, unignited, at his side.

“Can I try that?”

He smirked and chuckled. “You want to try my lightsaber? No way,” he said, teasing her.

“Why not?!”

“Well first of all, Rey, it’s probably too heavy for you. Second, you’d end up cutting off your hand, or worse, one of mine.”

She rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips. “You’re not the only one who’s force-sensitive, you know. Now give it up!”

Sighing, Kylo took hold of Rey’s arm, and placed the saber into her hand. He moved her arm with his hand, speaking softly, telling her how to relax her muscles, how to focus.

When he felt she had the basics down, he stepped back and nodded, and watched with mild apprehension as she turned it on.

Rey moved the way she had been taught, and after awhile, she seemed to become very comfortable with the weapon. Her body moved around gracefully, and her movements became more fluid.

“This is intoxicating,” she said to Kylo, smiling. “It feels so powerful.”

A sudden loud noise from the road made Rey jump. In doing so, she accidentally sliced a good-sized branch off of the tree she was in front of, which promptly fell onto the ship parked beneath it.

Reacting quickly, Kylo grabbed her hand and they ran into the building, Rey shock-giggling like crazy. They hid behind a doorframe for a few moments, and then, seeing that nobody had heard the commotion yet, they relaxed.

“That was Hux’s ship, wasn’t it?”

Kylo nodded, a huge grin on his face.

“Oh, Maker; I can’t believe I did that!”

“Oh, don’t worry; Hux is always bragging about his insurance. But if it makes you feel better, I’ll take the fall for you.”

“You don’t have to do that!”

“No, it’s okay. This happens every few months, anyway. I accidentally damage someone’s ship, and Snoke uses part of the budget to pay for damages. So it works out. Plus Hux expects this from _me_.”

“Well, thank you.”

“Welcome.”

Kylo looked down, and blushed. This entire time, while they were talking - - he had still been holding Rey’s hand. He gently let go, and shoved his own hands into his pockets.

“Accident aside, though, you’re really quite good, Rey. With the lightsaber, that is. With time, and practice, you could be great at it.”

Rey’s eyes lit up at the compliment. “Thank you! You know, I always wanted to be formally trained in the Force, but . . .”

She trailed off, but Kylo could pick the rest of the thought from her brain. Poe didn’t encourage or really approve of Rey’s abilities with the Force. He didn’t feel that they had the time, and certainly not the credits, to hire a proper teacher for her.

Instead of saying all this, Kylo just said, casually, 

“Well, you know, I normally take my two breaks outside, to practice things. Sometimes lightsaber, sometimes meditation, sometimes levitation. If - - if you ever want to take one of your breaks outside with me, I would be happy to show you a few things. I’m not a master, per say, but I’m decent enough. If - -“

Rey threw her arms around him, hard, starting him and nearly knocking him off-balance.

“You’re the sweetest person ever,” she said as she squeezed him. “I really love yo- -your friendship.”

“I love your friendship, too.”

LOC:

Kylo: “So I have a date tonight. Girl that my mother works with. I haven’t had a date in, let’s see, almost a whole year. I don’t know what it is, I can’t seem to form connections with anyone. Most girls don’t want to hear about how I burned myself with my saber, or how I finally managed to levitate my bed across the floor.”

 

LOC:

Rey: “Poe and I are supposed to go out and eat tonight. I can’t say I’m really looking forward to it. His idea of ‘a nice restaurant’ is the Cantina that uses cloth napkins. And his friends ALWAYS show up. Last time he left me sitting alone at the bar, and Rose started talking to me. No, she was hitting on me. I told Poe later on, but all he said was “That’s hot.” Guess I should feel lucky, to have such an understanding, open-minded man, huh?”

 

Cut back to Rey and Kylo, still hugging.

“Rey?”

Kylo instantly dropped his arms, and Rey jumped.

“Oh, hey, Poe,” she said, walking up to him. “What’s up?”

Poe took her in his arms, kissing her neck. “Hey. I just realized; I wasn’t paying much attention to you back there, was I? Come on, let me make it up to you, take you to a show, before our dinner tonight.”

“It’s the middle of the day, hun. We’ve both still got at least 5 hours to go, here.”

“No we don’t. I talked to Snoke, he said we could both leave early. Now come on, pretty lady!”

He took her hand and pulled her away. Rey looked back over her shoulder and said “See you tomorrow, Kylo!”

“See you,” he muttered, waving.

Kylo watched them walk away, an indescribable feeling flooding his chest. He walked slowly back into the building, and returned to his desk. He picked up his holophone and dialed his mom.

“Hey, mom? It’s me, Kylo. I guess you’re out of your office? Anyway, uh, something came up, and I won’t be able to make that date you had lined up for me. Can you please let the girl know I won’t be able to make it? Okay, thanks, love you bye.”

Hux smirked at him, as Kylo disconnected. “A date? Tsk, tsk. Won’t your girlfriend Rey be upset to hear that you’re cheating on her?”

“She’s not my girlfriend. Mind your own karking business.”

Hux just leaned back in his chair, chewing on a chocklime stick. “No, you’re right; she’s not your girlfriend. You don’t have the balls to make that happen.”

Kylo narrowed his eyes, and Hux went flying, chair and all, across the room and into the opposite wall.

Kylo picked up his jacket and his lightsaber, and stuck his head into Snoke’s office.

“I’m taking a sick day, the rest of the day,” he told him, before stomping out and to his ship below.

. . . . .

Later that night, Kylo sat, alone, in his bedroom. He had a communicator in his hand, and he thumbed the tiny device back and forth in his fingers, trying to work up his nerve.

“Just DO it, you idiot,” he hissed repeatedly to himself. “What are you afraid of? What’s the worse that can happen?”

_Poe hears about it and comes after you with all of his warehouse buddies._

“No, that’s not the worst thing. I can handle THAT. But what if, she laughs at me? What if she’s disgusted?”

_Then wouldn’t you rather know that, instead of sitting around and worrying about it? Either way it would end this torment, this doubt. Right?_

Kylo nodded to himself. Steeling his heart, he punched in Rey’s number, and waited.

He was both relieved and disappointed when he got her answering machine instead.

“Um, hey. It’s me. Kylo. Kylo Ren. Yeah so, um, I have something to tell you. A lot of things to tell you, actually; so bear with me, here - -“

. . . . .

Kylo was a wreck the next morning. Rey never returned his message, and when he arrived at work, she barely gave him a “Good Morning.” 

He waited for her to make her mid-morning trip to the break room for caff, and he casually got up and went after her.

He walked in on her sitting with her head down, her cheek propped up on her wrist and her hair covering her eyes, at the table.

“Rey? Are you alright?”

She yawned and nodded.

“Have you got a minute?”

“Of course.”

“Okay, Good. I really want to talk to you about the message I left you last night. Rey, I - -“

“Message?”, she asked, looking confused.

“The one I left on your communicator.

“Oh, you won’t believe this. So Poe got really drunk, right? He got so drunk he took both of our communicators, plunked them down in a whisky glass, and swallowed BOTH. We spent most of the night in the city Medical Bay, getting them surgically removed. They’re ruined, though. Sorry if I seem a little off today; I’m just really, really tired.”

Now she liked at Kylo with concern. “You say you left me a message? Was it important?”

Kylo let out a reliever laugh, and shook his head. “Nope. I, uh, I guess I was just bored, and wanted to see how your night was going.”

Rey laughed, too. “Oh. Well, now you know.”

She glanced up at the clock on the wall. “It’s almost break time. Is that offer to watch you train still open?”

“Always.”

They walked out to the elevators, laughing and joking all the way outside.


End file.
